SPOILERS More Detailed WWE SmackDown Results

Jun 26, 2013

The ring crew brought out an Irish flag, three bars complete with Bud Light taps (come on, no Guiness?), green bar stools, and green kendo sticks for the Dublin Street Fight. They also hung a donkey piñata with Dolph Ziggler’s head pasted on it for Del Rio’s fiesta.

Tony Chimel introduced “Columbia’s own” Lilian Garcia. She sang the National Anthem, then introduced Cole and JBL.

Orton vs. Kane was announced for later.

But, first, Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow in a Dublin Street Fight. Sheamus was out first to a large pop. They replayed Sandow’s attack last week. Lots of heat for Sandow. Sandow had a mic. He said South Carolina was the first state to secede, and after spending time here, he thinks it should secede again. He said South Carolina is like a third world country full of ignoramuses, and after he defeats the ignoramus in the ring, they will rename the match a Sandow Street Fight.

Sheamus beat Damien Sandow in a Dublin Street Fight. After one kendo stick shot from Sandow, Sheamus dominated early. He gave Sandow 10 Clubbing Blows over one of the bars. Sheamus then pulled a keg out from under the bar and threw it at Sandow, knocking him over. Next, a sack of potatoes from under the ring. (I won’t ask what a sack of potatoes would be doing under a wrestling ring.) As Sheamus brought Sandow back in the ring, Sandow slammed him head-first into the stairs. Sandow on the attack. More weapons were involved, then Sandow hit Terminus, but Sheamus kicked out. Lots of kendo stick shots to Sheamus’s head and back. Then, Sheamus dished out kendo stick shots. He tried to hit White Noise onto two chairs, but Sandow blocked. Sandow then threw Sheamus into the ropes, but put his head down too soon, allowing Sheamus to knee-lift Sandow into the chairs. Sheamus followed with the Brogue Kick for the pin. Good match.

– Kane was in the back, and Daniel Bryan approached whistling. Kane thinks he’s in a good mood just because he finally beat Randy Orton, although Kane was impressed. Kane called it an upset, but Bryan did not agree. He said Kane has a match with Orton, and in spite of the various things Kane has said, Bryan will be on commentary during the match and will help Kane if Kane needs him. He then hugged Kane, who not impressed.

– Miz TV segment. They replayed the Heyman-Punk segment from Raw. Heyman was Miz’s guest and while the video played, a fan loudly yelled “Miz sucks!” Miz mockingly gave him a thumbs up.

Miz challenged Heyman’s explanation from Raw in his annoying, grating way. He said he won’t be bullied like Heyman bullied Renee Young last week. Heyman introduced someone who can bully Miz – Curtis Axel. Miz’s vocal detractor in the crowd was unrelenting during this. Miz said Heyman fooled him by making him think it was a one-on-one interview, just like he fooled everyone on Raw. Miz said Axel is uninvited, but Heyman said he invited him and now Miz won’t ask intimidating questions. Miz told some unfunny Star Wars jokes, then tried to create friction, but Axel did not bite and doubted that Miz can take the Intercontinental Title from him. Axel said he is very possessive of the Intercontinental Title (and proceeded to take the belt off and throw it on the ground), then Miz challenged him to a title match tonight. Heyman spoke up that his client doesn’t fight for free. Axel then attacked Miz and hit a neckbreaker. Axel and Heyman walked off, leaving Miz lying in the ring to end the segment.

– Lilian led the crowd in a “Game … Cocks” chant during the break.

– A.J. vs. Natalya was next. A.J. came skipping down to the ring as they replayed A.J.’s spoof of Kaitlyn on Raw. A.J. was very amused by this. Natalya came down, but then A.J.’s music started playing again. Kaitlyn came out dressed like A.J. She went through all of AJ’s relationship and said she sure knew her way around the back. She added that there were rumors A.J. also had relationships with the timekeeper, the ringside doctor, and Lilian Garcia.

Natalya pinned Divas champion A.J. Lee in a non-title match. The match started with Kaitlyn watching at the top of the ramp. A.J. took control, but Kaitlyn came skipping down and skipped around the ring. This enraged and distracted A.J. Natalya then rolled her up from behind and pinned her. A.J. started arguing with the referee and Kaitlyn came into the ring and speared her. Big E. then scraped A.J. off the mat and took her to the back while Kaitlyn celebrated in the ring.

– Teddy Long was backstage. Vince McMahon came into the office and asked him what he was going to do about the World Title MITB match. Teddy said that while the WWE championship MITB match was all about all stars, this MITB match would be for young up-and-comers, which, just between him and Vince (even though it was on the Titantron for all to see) was something Booker T had never thought of. The participants in the World Title MITB match are Wade Barrett, Jack Swagger, Antonio Cesaro, Dean Ambrose, Fandango, Cody Rhodes, and Damien Sandow. (I hope I’m not forgetting anyone, but it was all heels.) Vince was pleased and then they argued over how to pronounce Fandango.

– Kane vs. Randy Orton was next. Daniel Bryan was out first for commentary, then Kane came out to ridiculously loud pyro. Orton was out next to a massive pop.

Randy Orton beat Kane. Slow-paced, back-and-forth match. I think the crowd sensed that nothing important would happen until Bryan got involved. The crowd was more behind Orton than Kane. Suddenly, Bryan jumped up on the announce table and led the crowd in a “Yes!” chant. When Orton took control, he started a “No!” chant. Neither wrestler in the ring paid him any attention, and he sat back down to resume commentary as the match continued. After more back and forth, Orton hit the hangman DDT and Kane rolled to the outside to regroup. After taking his sweet time, Bryan got up to “help” Kane by rolling him back into the ring to avoid a count-out. Unfortunately, he rolled him back right into an RKO for the pin. Bryan sold shock and dismay as he walked up the ramp while Kane sold frustration in the ring.

Ryback beat Justin Gabriel. Jobber entrance for Gabriel and still some cheers for Ryback, who won in a virtual squash.

After the match, Ryback sold a leg injury. So, Chris Jericho came out and expressed fake concern over the apparent injury, saying Ryback was just setting up another excuse. He got a “Cryback” chant going. He came down and attacked Ryback, then rolled him into the ring and attacked the injured leg. He went for the Walls of Jericho, but Ryback blocked it and bailed up the ramp.

– The de facto main event is up next: Christian & The Usos vs. The Shield in a six-man tag match. Presumably, this match was set up by what occurred on Main Event.

– Another Wyatt Family promo aired, and then the 1-800-FELLA spot from Raw. I don’t understand the point of those.

– They replayed the events from Main Event on the video screen leading into…

Christian & The Usos beat The Shield in a six-man tag match. Yes, Shield lost another six-man tag. Shield worked over one of the Usos until he got the lukewarm tag to Christian. The Usos and Reigns and Rollins took each other out with some aerial maneuvers outside the ring. Ambrose got up with his back to Christian and turned around into a spear. Christian pinned Ambrose to a somewhat decent pop. Christian was elated while the Shield sold anger and frustration in the ring. I can understand the loss to Bryan a few weeks, but not this one.

– Time for Del Rio’s fiesta. There were Mexican flags, balloons, a buffet table with Mexican food, and the Ziggler piñata. Ricardo Rodriguez (sans bucket) leads a mariachi band to the ring. Ricardo mocked South Carolina and then introduced Del Rio, who gloated a little and then vowed to speak in Spanish the rest of the night while confusing closed captioning with subtitles. After several minutes’s worth of remarks in Spanish, he reverted to English, then whacked the Ziggler piñata and broke it. He wondered where Ziggler is, since Ziggler had promised to ruin the fiesta.

As if on cue, Ziggler emerged on-stage (sans A.J. and Big E.). He then took off his jacket and walked down to the ring. Del Rio swung at him with the piñata stick and missed, then Ziggler attacked Del Rio and Rodriguez. He clotheslined Ricardo over the top rope and fought Del Rio while the mariachi band fleed. Ricardo went to the top rope, but Ziggler caught him and threw him through the buffet table. He grabbed a guitar left behind by the mariachi band and swung for Del Rio, but he ducked and retreated through the crowd. Ricardo recovered just in time to get a guitar shot in the back.

Ziggler grabbed a sombrero and the now-broken guitar and proceeded to play a song with the mariachi band on the ramp. His music hit and a bunch of red, white, and green balloons descended from the ceiling. Ziggler walked up the ramp as his music played. Then, all of a sudden, Del Rio re-emerged from backstage and attacked Ziggler from behind. He beat him down the ramp and back into the ring, where he and Ricardo worked him over. However, Ziggler soon turned the tables and Del Rio ate a fame-asser. The heels retreated up the ramp and Ziggler celebrated in the ring with the World Title.

There was no dark match after the show concluded.

FINAL THOUGHTS: It was a somewhat late arriving crowd, but by the time Smackdown started, pretty much every available seat was filled. The crowd stayed pretty hot for a while, but seemed to die after the Kane-Orton match. Overall, it was a decent show, except for The Shield loss. I can excuse having them lose to Bryan, since he’s the hottest act in the company right now, but having them lose to a mildly-over Christian and the not-over-at-all Usos makes me fear that they’re losing their mystique and turning into run-of-the-mill heels who trade pointless wins and losses with uninteresting babyfaces while feuding over meaningless secondary titles.

Biggest Pops:

– Orton
– Jericho
– Sheamus
– Bryan

Biggest Heat:

– Sandow
– Shield
– Del Rio
– Colter/Cesaro

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