WWF Raw is War Results – March 12, 2001

March 12, 2001
Los Angeles, California
Hosted by Jim Ross and Paul Heyman
Report by Fred Venturini – TPWW.net

Hey everyone, welcome to TPWW’s coverage of Raw is War, and Raw opens up with some footage, recapping how Debra has joined the Rock, and how on Smackdown Rock defeated Rikishi and Haku. If you need to brush up on that, check out last week’s Smackdown recap.

Now Raw is coming live from the Staples Center in LA, and Paul Heyman once again joins JR at ringside to add some color commentary.

Kurt Angle is shown anxiously waiting outside as Paul says that Kurt has gone postal lately.

MATCH: THE HARDY BOYZ VS. X-PAC AND JUSTIN CREDIBLE
The champs come down accompanied by the lovely, distracting, voluptuous Lita. Credible and Pac come down to some new, generic music. Pac starts off against Jeff, and Jeff immediately gets whipped into the turnbuckle, bouncing above a charging X-Pac and dropkicking him in the head. Tag to Matt, and they double-elbow Pac for a quick two. He recovers and tags Justin, who gets worked on by Matt with a gutwrench suplex and another quick pin. X-Pac then kicks Matt in the back of the head, distracting him, and Credible dumps him. On the outside, both men drive Matt’s crotch into the steel post. Back in the ring, they continue the assault with patented X-Pac kicks, and then he gets the Bronco Buster for good measure. Credible comes in and tries to slide into a prone Matt Hardy, only to have him move, thus causing him to get the steel post Justin-the nuts. Jeff then gets the tag, and flips into the ring, dropkicking both men and landing a crazy corkscrew move on Pac. Now the Hardyz get poetry in motion, but the heels come back with X-Pac tossing Jeff right into Lita. In the ring, Matt gets the twist of fate on Credible as Jeff goes up for the Swanton bomb. As Jeff makes the cover, Albert of all people breaks it up. He tosses Jeff onto the concrete and absolutely crushes Matt Hardy with the Albert bomb. T & A’s music hits as Albert poses with X-Pac and Justin Credible.
WINNERS VIA DQ: THE HARDY BOYZ

Kurt is again shown pacing in the parking lot as a limo arrives. Commisioner Regal comes out, and Angle begs him for a rematch against the Rock. Regal blows him off saying that he’ll take it into consideration. Angle tries to suck up to him by saying he has a nice suit on. Raw to commercial.

As we return, Dennis Hopper is shown in the crowd. I love that guy! Bad things, man. Now Eddie is shown addressing the Radicalz, telling them that Benoit is a traitor. As Guererro and Malenko leave, Saturn looks for a rope to lynch Benoit with. Benoit hops out of the hall and jumps Saturn, locking on the crossface as he utters he only has two more to go.

Back in the ring, Commisioner Regal makes his way to the ring. He welcomes everyone to the first day of the Regal Regime. He promises, nay vows, to work tirelessly for the fans. He hopes that the fans will show their due respect, and they do, chanting Regal sucks, and then up(down?)grading to an asshole chant. He does not like a suckup, and kissing bums may be respected in LA, but Regal doesn’t tolerate it. His decisions are his own. Tonight he says, Rock will face Kurt Angle for the WWF championship. He tells the people what to expect through an anagram of his name. R is for respect, he will treat his post with respect. E is for education. He says the US education system sucks, and we should listen to him. G is for . . . the spelling bee is over as the Jericho countdown interrupts, and he’s got a mike in hand.

Jericho says that G is for good God Regal, shut the hell up! Jericho then shows footage of him screwing up Regal’s “proper” dinner a few weeks back. Regal says he won’t be besmirched. Jericho asks how he got that dreadful black eye. Did Mr. McMahon stop short when his nose was going straight up his arse? If Regal is still that castrated, two-faced, puppet of Vince that Jericho thinks he is, he’ll keep humiliating and embarrassing him because that’s what the fans want to see. But, since he’s talking about anagrams, Jericho has one of his own. Y is for why are you a pompous, spineless, ass-clown? 2 is for your mommy and daddy who are pompous, spineless, ass-clowns too. J is for junior . . . and junior, if you don’t do this job to the utmost of your abilities, old bean, you will never, e-e-e-e-ever be the same again! Raw goes to commercial.

As we return, Christian is coming down as they roll footage of the Dudleyz losing their titles.

MATCH: D-VON DUDLEY VS. CHRISTIAN
Note: The winner’s team gets a title shot at Wrestlemania. D-Von is met outside for some preliminary brawling, and it continues inside the ring as D-Von hits a powerslam for a quick two. Now they head outside, with Christian slamming D-Von against the post, moving him back inside for a bodyslam. Christian hits a wicked reverse DDT onto his knee. Ouch! He then works away with some one-handed choke, and then goes up top where D-Von jars him loose, then superplexing him down. D-Von clothesline now, and he picks up the pace with a flying elbow. Christian scores a quick two with a rollup, but D-Von comes back with a clothesline, missing Christian and hitting the ref. Christian lands the reverse DDT, and goes out for a chair. Buh Buh then comes out, and he catches the chair in midswing. D-Von then sets up the 3-D, which Buh Buh delivers. The ref recovers as D-Von makes the cover for the three count and the win.
WINNERS VIA PINFALL: THE DUDLEY BOYZ

Now a limo is showing up in the back, and it’s Vince. He brings Trish out, telling her she looks great. Since this is Hollywood, he says that Trish and Vince should go out to the ring and perform a Hollywood, live sex scene. Trish says whatever he wants she’ll do.

Eddie and Malenko are walking around, and Malenko is carrying a pipe. Benoit slams a door shut and jumps him, disarming him and crushing him with the pipe as the door is locked. He then unlocks it and hides behind it as Eddie comes in to help Dean. Benoit suprises him, telling him that it’s time. “See you in the ring,” he says.

Regal is at his desk, and he announces that Jericho will face the entire RTC stable in a handicap match. Regal calls it the spirit of good competition.

Now Angle gets an interview, and he says that he held the title for five months, which is longer than most LA marriages last. Tonight, he’ll take back his WWF title, and as a free bonus, he’ll snap the Rocks ankle. Micheal Cole then asks about Debra, and Angle says what about her? She’s got a winning smile, a great personality, and if she gets in his way, he might have to take matters into his own (dramatic pause) hands.

MATCH: CHRIS BENOIT VS. EDDIE GUERRERO
The match starts off with kicks and punches, until Benoit lands a tilt a whirl backbreaker. Eddie gets an elbow, but Benoit comes back with a huge german suplex. Kicks and chops from Eddie now, but Benoit comes back by tossing him into the air off of the ropes, then benchpressing him down, but Eddie hangs on with an armdrag. Benoit now chops away, and hard. Off of the ropes again, and the Crippler buries his knee in Latino Heat’s abdomen. Eddie comes back with a lightning fast hurricanrana, and lines up a suplex, but Benoit reverses, side suplexing Eddie over the ropes and onto the floor. Benoit goes for a suicide dive to the outside, but Eddie sidesteps, stomping away at Benoit and tossing him back in. A good, hard side suplex from Latino Heat for a two count. Fast action off of the ropes, and Eddie hits another stiff elbow. Chris refuses to be pinned after another two count, and Eddie continues with a necbreaker and yet another two count. Now a sleeper applied, but the Crippler dumps him onto the ropes. Both men scoring with rights now, and Benoit builds momentum, drilling Eddie with and elbow, locking around his waist for a series of three solid German suplexes. Benoit then signals for the headbutt, and he climbs to the top, hitting his patented shot. Both men are down now because Benoit seems to be hurt too. He rolls over to cover Eddie, but Eddie kicks out. Back to life, Eddie hits two brainbuster vertical suplextes in succession, and he goes up top, only to miss his frogsplash. Benoit rolls up Guererro for a quick pin, but Eddie reverses for a two of his own. Then, Benoit rolls him over right into the crossface for the tap out! Wow, what a great match. These guys left the ring sore, I’ll guarantee it.
WINNER VIA SUBMISSION: CHRIS BENOIT

Raw goes to commercial, and when it returns, Vince and Trish go to the ring. Vince says that Trish has a lot in common with the stars of Hollywood. Blonde mane, heaving, beautiful breasts, and they would do anything for stardom. Just like she did last week. Vince rolls footage from last week. Just for the record, he says that she wasn’t forced. Trish says she would do anything for Mr. McMahon. Vince says that Linda is watching, and then he rolls Smackdown footage-the most unromantic kiss ever! Damn, I’m jealous. Speaking of jealous, Vince is going to make Trish lay down on her back as they recreate a Hollywood sex scene. Vince then gets down there, and he lays next to her. She whispers something in his ear, and he gets them both up. The idea she has is too good for people to see. He announces that they’re going to go back to his locker room, but there’s one other thing. He announces that . . . but Vince’s music hits? He says he’s not finished and to cut his music. Hmmm. Vince looks really pissed, and now he’s shocked as Shane comes out! Shane McMahon is out! Shane looks pissed off, and Vince looks like he’s seen a ghost. Shane saunters down the ramp and gets right in his face. Vince says that they haven’t seen each other. He wants Shane to collect his thoughts and calm down. Vince then offers his hand to shake like any father and son would. Shane won’t do it. Vince then says how about a hug, and Shane-O snaps! He starts slugging away at Vince, I mean pounding away at him. Regal runs out to make a save, but Shane just grabs his British ass and keeps slugging away. Vince runs away, going all the way to the back and hopping in his limo as Shane chases. Raw goes to commercial.

Coming back, the RTC comes out to face Chris Jericho.

HANDICAP MATCH: RTC VS. CHRIS JERICHO
Y2J starts against Bull, punching and chopping away. Bull comes back with a clothesline, but Y2J keeps fighting, kicking him in the face and landing a dropkick from the second turnbuckle. He hits a lionsault and only gets two as the Goodfather makes the save. Val in now, and Jericho hits his butterfly backbreaker move. Val’s knee looks hurt, and while the ref checks on him, Y2J gets battered in the RTC corner. Val then gets a Russian leg sweep for a quick two. Goodfather continues the assault with a side suplex. Bull tags in, missing a right as Y2J cracks Goodfather with a clothesline and kicks Bull. Stevie hits his superkick to break it up, and then Bull misses Y2J and nails the Goodfather. They exchange a push and some words as they go to the outside and start brawling. Inside the ring, Val is in the walls of Jericho. Bull comes in, and he gets the same fate. When the Goodfather comes in, he gets a dose of the Walls too. Stevie gets on the apron and Y2J knocks him off. Val then sneaks up, hitting his suplex finisher for the three count.
WINNERS VIA PINFALL: RTC

Angle is shown in the back with Austin in his face. Austin says he’s the last son of a bitch he wants to piss off. Kurt says that he doesn’t have a problem with Steve or his wife . . . yet.

Dick Butkus is shown in the stands, and JR and Heyman tell the fans about a call to action for the XFL. There were some great games this weekend, and be sure to check out the main page for this week’s edition of XFL Blitz, which should be up soon!

MATCH: THE BIG SHOW VS. THE UNDERTAKER
Big Show comes out with the title belt that looks like a wristband in proportion to his body. Damn that fella is huge.

Now the Undertaker is getting ready to come out to the ring on his bike. When he gets on, HHH sneaks up and pushes it over. The cameraman falls down, and as we return to full view, the Undertaker is trapped underneath. HHH grabs a chair and places the legs of it over Undertaker’s face, sitting on it and trapping UT against the crossbar of the chair. HHH says that that looks like it hurts, asking if it’s heavy. He then asks if he’s the guy who cripples people, if he’s the guy who makes people famous. HHH says that he’s already famous for crippling people, putting them out, and if the UT keeps screwing with him, he’ll cripple the Deadman. He tells him to think about it as he leaves. Undertaker tells him to finish the job while he has a chance. HHH cocks the chair, and UT says “you better make it a good shot too bitch!” Funny stuff. However, HHH freezes up as Kane sprints in. He tries to help the bike off of his brother, but the Big Show comes in, hitting Kane with a Showstopper through a table.

Now Austin and the Rock are facing each other in the locker room, and Austin says he had a talk with Kurt, and if something happens to Debra he’s going to whip Kurt’s ass. And just so the Rock knows, he’ll whip his ass too. Rock says he has one concern, and that’s taking care of Kurt Angle. However, Austin should be concerned about one thing . . . getting ready. Austin says he’s been ready as he walks away. Wow. Intense stuff.

MATCH: TEST VS. RAVEN
Test opens up with big kicks and punches, and then a nice bodyslam. Raven goes outside, and Test follows, getting a faceful of post. Raven then sweeps Test into the guardwall. Back in now, Raven is taunting Test, landing a bulldog and going for the pin and the Euro title, but coming up empty. With a sleeper applied, Raven gets piggybacked into the turnbuckle. Test then hits a huge tilt a whirl slam, but gets only two. Raven then tastes a fullnelson into a rockbottom type move hard into the canvas. Test then gets his big foot into Raven’s face, and that’s enough for a three count and a win.

Angle, Rock, and Austin are shown. Each one is ready, intense, and waiting. Raw to commercial.

MATCH: KURT ANGLE VS. THE ROCK
Angle is intense and waiting for the Rock in the ring as the champ struts out with Debra by his side. Rock charges out of the gate, and with three punches gets Angle in the sharpshooter. Angle gets to the ropes, and Rock gets a DDT and a quick two. Angle takes a TO on the outside, and Rock starts to chase him down the ramp, getting a right on Angle. Rock then cracks him in the nuts for good measure, and Angle runs back towards the ring. Rock catches him, slamming Angles head off of the announce table. He tries it again, but Angle gets him in the gut, and then he hits Rock in the ribs with the edge of a chair. Kicks to the injured area now, and when Rock comes back to his feet, Angle drops his face on the security wall. Rock is getting flat out punished on the outside with feet and fist, and Angle finally puts him back in the ring, where Rocky fires back with a right, but Angle knocks him right back down where the kicks continue. Angle then hits a vertical suplex for a two count. Rock is in the corner now, with Angle kicking and choking away at him. Rock charges out of the corner to fight back, but Kurt locks up a belly to belly suplex. Rock gets up, and Angle repeats the move. So far, total domination by the Olympic champ as he hits the same overhead belly to belly suplex once again, getting a two count. Kurt charges the Rock now, but Rock sidesteps and tosses him out. A winded Rocky follows, and gets dropped across the announce table. Kurt stays on him, putting him back in the ring for a textbook bodyslam. Angle goes up top now to taunt the fans . . . no, to try his moonsault! But he misses it badly as Rocky moves. Both men are down, Angle up first and he gets the Olympic slam! He can’t follow up with a pin because both men are down, but Kurt drapes his arm over the Rock for the one . . . two . . . no! Angle then locks on a bearhug, and the ref checks the Rock’s arm. It drops twice, but the champ fires back, beating down and spinning him into the Rock Bottom, but he can’t follow up immediately. He grabs Angle’s kneepad and makes a pin, but gets only two. Both men are down once again, and Rock pummels Angle with stiff rights. Somehow, the ref got hurt in the exchange, and the Rock hits the spinebuster, and sets up the People’s Elbow, which he scores for the one . . . two . . . no! Angle kicks out! Rock kicks in disgust because he didn’t get there fast enough, and Angle gets the ankle lock on the champ. Rock grabs the ropes, but Angle doesn’t let go and the ref calls for the bell. Debra tries to get him to break it, but Angle puts her in the lock! Austin comes in for the save, stomping a mudhole in Angle’s ass, tossing him out of the ring. An enraged Stone Cold then stunners the Rock, rolling out of the ring and walking towards the back as Debra tends to the Rock, but Austin doesn’t care as he walks away and Raw fades out.
WINNER VIA DQ: THE ROCK